I'm good I Hate Socialising.

I Hate Socialising.

I’m not sure if it is my bipolar, or if I have just grown to not like to go out and socialise. When I was in my twenties that’s all I did. Socialise. In my early thirties, I still did but with some reluctance. It generally had to be with alcohol, which it was, and …

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I'm good Today’s Happy List

Today’s Happy List

I did good today. Being happy remained my one mission all day. My playlists had me almost singing on the train. And smiling at the thought of breaking out in song (badly) amongst serious commuters who don’t even say hello back. My playlists also had me stay on task at work and I had a …

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I'm good Music

Music

Music would have to be my biggest tool in managing my bipolar. Which makes Spotify one of my best friends. I use one of their focus or study playlists when I’m struggling to stay on task. Or when I’m in the office and its noisy and I need my own space. When I have the …

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I'm good Sunshine and daisies.

Sunshine and daisies.

I haven’t taken my meds for a couple of days. It’s been about a week without citalopram. And only a couple of nights without lithium and quetiapine. Not on purpose. Just fallen out of routine I guess. But one thing I do notice when I stop taking my meds, is things get sharp again. I’m …

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I'm good I’m good.

I’m good.

It was my partner’s birthday yesterday. The week before I was dreading it because I hadn’t organised anything. But I really enjoyed it. I really enjoyed doing nice things for him. I got excited about his birthday like I used to get excited about birthdays and Christmas when I was younger. I really liked the …

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Down That bottom again.

That bottom again.

NOTE: I in no way whatsoever encourage, support or advise any other person to take action towards ending their own life. If at any stage you need help towards preventing this, please seek immediate help here. This last week or so is really fuzzy. I think I hit bottom again. Which is a good thing …

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Down Exhausted. Again.

Exhausted. Again.

I haven’t showered for days. And I haven’t brushed my teeth for almost as many days. Four days no showers. Three days no teeth cleaning. Three days ago I put my hair in a couple of braids and they are still in those braids. I don’t know what it is when you’re depressed that showers …

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Down Frickin pizza.

Frickin pizza.

I hate the C word. If I use it, I know that I am down. I get so frickin angry so easily. Tonight it was pizza. Frickin pizza. Friday is pizza night and last week we did home-made so this week is buy-in. I tried to place our normal online order twice. Both times it …

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Down It started with concentration (or lack thereof)…

It started with concentration (or lack thereof)…

Sometimes I find it really hard to concentrate. To stay on task. I’ll open my laptop and then before I know it, there’s fifteen tabs open and I’ve completely forgotten what I started doing. Though generally what I end up doing is fun. But it can go on all day and at the end of …

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Down A cheap wedding.

A cheap wedding.

I’ve often thought about getting married. But never sure if it’s exactly what I want to do. I never used to. Then not so long ago I thought, yes, of course I want to get married. I thought about the song that I would walk down the aisle to. I thought about my partner’s face …

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